Totally Tubular

I'm taking a different approach to this blog post, but then again this story is about a new brand of evil.

I will be quoting from story that I got off the LA TIMES website. You can read the full story here.  The comments in black are from the article. My rebuttal appears in RED which is the color meat should be.

Would you eat mystery meat grown in a lab if doing so was better for the environment?  HELL NO!
The debate may seem abstract, but scientists could turn a test-tube burger into reality by October.
The $330,000 project being conducted by Mark Post, chairman of physiology at Maastricht University in the Netherlands, involves a cow’s stem cells (where they going to get these stem cells? From cows right?) and funds from an anonymous private investor.
Post has already created several small strips of muscle tissue that, once he makes thousands more, will be mashed together to create a burger patty.These strips are a yellowish off-white color due to a lack of blood in the tissue.

... coming up with alternatives is a pressing concern, according to researchers who claim (yeah, and I claim Lettuce is the Devil) that conventional livestock production is devastating to the environment and dangerous for human health.
"Animal farming is by far the biggest ongoing environmental catastrophe," said Patrick Brown, a biochemist at Stanford University School of Medicine. Brown is working on a separate project aimed at creating meat substitutes -- and eventually dairy and other products -- using plant materials. (Vegan bastard! Yeah I know the article doesn't label him a such but who the hell else would want to replace meat with plant materials.)


Supermarket shelves have seen growing a growing number of mock meats (not unlike the false gods the bible warns against)-- known as meat analogues -- as the ranks of vegetarians and vegans grow. (Fungus and mold grows too, but that doesn't mean it's a good thing)

 PETA is offering a $1-million prize to the first producer who manages to sell in-vitro chicken meat in 10 states by the end of June. (PETA should spend that million actually taking care of animals rather than euthanizing 90% of the pets under their care)

Demand for meat worldwide will boom 60% by 2050, (and here I thought vegans and vegetarians numbers were growing. You;d think that meat would be in less demand) according to Nicholas Genovese ...

Factory farms take up massive swaths of land and suck up enormous energy reserves while crowding together animals who, in those closely confined quarters, could (shoulda, woulda, coulda)  spawn outbreaks of E.coli and other food-borne illnesses, he said.

Here is this Meat Man's take. I'm not fool enough to use the word never. If the world truly did go to complete shit I might eat a test tube burger but I promise that long before that happens you won;t be able to find so much as a single squirrel running around my neighborhood.

Hell's I'll boil my old leather shoes and eat them before I'll sink my teeth into a salad or a snot colored burger created in a lab.